What a week it’s been. Many of us are exhausted, sad, still processing the election outcome. And life doesn’t stop, does it? For myself, that meant calling a plumber for a kitchen drain that backs up every few years, admitting our dishwasher needs to be replaced, juggling the budget to pay for new tires on my car. It meant listening to friends and my kids as they struggled to balance how they were feeling with the reality of whatever needed to be done that day, whether it was job-related or family-related or something else.
That makes this weekend time particularly welcome. Even the rhythm of doing housework feels soothing in this moment: the warmth of the dishwater as I wash the breakfast dishes, the smell of lavender as I clean the bathroom, the swoosh of water in the washing machine as our dirty clothes magically become clean again, the hum of the vacuum as Mick moves around the house. There is the anticipation of listening to our friends’ acoustic trio when they play tonight at a nearby bistro. There is the softness of the sweatpants I’m wearing as I write, comfortable in the second-hand desk chair I have in my office. There is the little glow from the lava lamp a friend sent me for my birthday. And there are the pictures of my family on the magnetic bulletin board beside my desk.
All week, I’ve been seeking comfort and beauty wherever I am. The other piece of this equation is to offer comfort and beauty to someone else.
May today’s offering please you in some small way.
An impressionist reflection of the trees around Como Lake, St. Paul, Minnesota. There is something about November-ish trees and sky that feels calm, as if calling us to settle in, find our favorite blanket, sip our favorite beverage, be safe at home.
This bald eagle appeared in a tree near Como Lake yesterday. Someone coming toward Mick and me on the walking path said, “Did you see the eagle?” We looked up and there he was, looking around, grooming his wings, considering his next move. Eagles keep their wits about themselves no matter what. Their focus is sharp. Meanwhile, in our own yard, we are offering a buffet. Squirrels and robins have noshed on our crabapples these past few days. The Halloween pumpkins are now in the garden, decomposing and, perhaps, getting nibbled on. Food for others has been the focus of our yard for a long time.
In the wake of our election results, I’ve decided to take whatever small actions I can to put kindness, comfort, encouragement, and beauty back into the world.
That means retooling One Minnesota Crone a little bit by posting more frequently for a while, sharing whatever Zen moments I stumble over and gather up. This is, after all, a place of encouragement in itself, a place of finding something that nourishes, boosts, calms.
Today, I feel like I did at the beginning of the pandemic, uncertain and worried. But I also feel that I learned from that experience – learned how to find resilience, understand the power of gratitude, weed out bad information, connect with those who know that difficulties are a nudge to find a better path forward.
Let’s get going.
Today’s moment of much-needed Zen:
The way birds flock, any birds, against a gray November sky, reminds us we are better together than divided. These are cedar waxwings (hard to see in the dim light, I know) who came through our yard to feast on the nearby crabapple tree’s abundance. Once nourished, together they will migrate for the winter.
This is how I’m staying sane during this insane election season.
A couple of weeks ago, Mick and I spent a week in California visiting Pacific Grove, Big Sur, and Monterey. We hiked among redwoods and alongside the Pacific Ocean, rested, sipped wine, read, ignored the news and reclaimed a slower pace that feels healthier than what we’ve been doing. It’s so seductive, feeling like we have to stay on top of the news, get stuff done, say yes to invitations that fill our calendars until there’s no space left. I’m very good at giving away my time until I realize I have left none for myself. So, a reset was just the thing. Not only that, but we had Mick’s birthday to celebrate.
Flying directly into the five-gate Monterey airport from Minneapolis proved to be a good choice for starting our vacation/reset. Picking up our rental car was easy, and the route to our hotel took about 15 minutes. We had a room booked at the Centrella Hotel in Pacific Grove, and we arrived just in time for their nightly wine tasting. After enjoying some nice pinot noir, we took a two-block walk up the hill to dinner at a local Italian restaurant, La Mia Cucina, where we sat at a little table in back and enjoyed some wonderful classic spaghetti and meatballs for Mick and fresh fish for me. The evening closed with a post-dinner walk back down the hill, fog rolling in, and we were enchanted.
Centrella Hotel, Pacific Grove, CA
Early morning walk to Lover’s Point
A couple of sea otters, just chilling
Pelicans everywhere
Foggy overlook
That fog was still there early the next morning. We woke before breakfast was available in the hotel dining room, our bodies still on Minnesota time. We decided to walk down to Lover’s Point to get some exercise. Big, crashing waves greeted us, and some well-seasoned surfers floated in the roiling water, waiting for a good wave. We watched them for at least half an hour. A relaxed sea otter hung out in the waves just behind the surfers, little paws working on his breakfast. I was surprised at how many people were out so early in the foggy morning, running, walking dogs, watching the ocean. We felt at home. The fog was no less thick when we returned to the Centrella, got coffee, ate yogurt parfaits, and talked about our plans for the day. We decided to walk to the Monterey Bay Aquarium, since it was only a mile away and our rental car was fine parked on the street until later. We arrived just in time to see two humpback whale flukes in the bay. Everyone at the aquarium was excited about the whales, crowded around the observation area, phone cameras rolling. We took it as an auspicious moment, a sign that we were going to see some wonderful things in the week to come.
We weren’t wrong.
A sea otter at feeding time – Monterey Bay Aquarium
Purple-striped jelly – Monterey Bay Aquarium
Moon jelly – Monterey Bay Aquarium
Giant Pacific octopus – Monterey Bay Aquarium
After two nights in Pacific Grove, we headed south on Highway 1 to Big Sur, where we had a cabin reserved at Deetjen’s Big Sur Inn. The place is rustic: wood-stove heated cabins, no cell service, no wi-fi, no televisions, dim room lighting. One emergency phone lived on the side of one of the main buildings. Cats meandered in the gardens and made themselves at home on the hoods of cars with still-warm engines. Redwoods surrounded everything. The sound of the ocean shushed and boomed just across the road. Hummingbirds zipped around the flowers still blooming in mid-October, sometimes narrowly missing my head.
Entrance to Deetjen’s
Our room
This little black cat hung around us a lot
I was in a happy place
Redwoods forever
Deetjen’s is where we really relaxed, found the quiet inside ourselves. It was our base for a few hikes in nearby Pfeiffer Big Sur State Park and Julia Pfeiffer Burns State Park, where we were reminded that we are used to hiking on much flatter ground. The restaurant at Deetjen’s is well-known for its locally-sourced breakfasts and dinners, simple and hearty preparation, and a coziness that other places nearby lack. In our cabin, I started reading Steinbeck’s Cannery Row, which felt like just the right kind of book for those surroundings. Given that the Franklin Room we stayed in was built in the 1940s, when Cannery Row came out, and that we had just strolled along the actual Cannery Row only a day before, I felt transported in a way that never would have happened if I read the book at home.
But the real gift of Deetjen’s was time among the redwoods. Mick loves redwoods more than anyone else I know, and he drank them in. On our last morning there, we just sat for a while near a little waterfall on the property, inhaling the scent of the redwoods and relishing how disconnected we were from the rest of the world in those moments.
We could have stayed there the entire time.
Waterfall at Deetjen’s
But we didn’t. We had our last room for the week reserved in Monterey, a nice room with a fireplace that was walking distance from the old Monterey downtown area and fisherman’s wharf. In Monterey, we were back to noise and lots of people and traffic, but that was okay. Walking to so many places was easy, we found one of the best taco trucks ever (Wedo’s), enjoyed a simple breakfast at the Old Monterey Cafe, sampled local beer at the Dust Bowl Brewing Company, and used Monterey as a base to go do some wine tasting at three different places.
The site in Monterey we visited every day that we were there was, of course, where the sea lions have taken over an area near San Carlos Beach. There is a national marine sanctuary in Monterey Bay. I finally learned the difference between sea lions and harbor seals (sea lions have ear flaps and harbor seals don’t, sea lions bark loudly and harbor seals don’t). I also learned that massive groups of sea lions smell awful, but they are hilarious to watch.
Sea lions as far as the eye can see
No one is going to argue with the sea lions about using the park benches
Coming home from such a magical week in California was jarring. I am so grateful that we had the chance to take a break during this election season, that we could come back home rested and somewhat ready for what is coming. I’ve been thinking about the quiet of that week a lot since we’ve been back, tucking away little pieces of solace that I know I’ll be calling up in the weeks to come.
I can’t believe it’s already been a year since Constance Brewer and I celebrated the publication of our co-authored poetry collection, Prayer Gardening (Kelsay Books, 2023). In honor of the anniversary, here is a seasonal poem of mine from the book:
Night Poem #1
A shooting star arced across the eastern sky, broke into bits beyond our neighbor’s trees. The dog took no notice, wondered why I went back toward the street when she had no more poop to give. I tugged her leash, insisted on looking up to witness meteoric flash-flash-flare-out. I wanted more, but the only other movement was our neighbor jogging in the dark.
I thought of you then, your plane over the Atlantic Ocean. You would touch down in Europe while I slept. I wasn’t sad you headed to Italy without me. I was sad I was home without you, half of our bed cool to the touch.
Travel doesn’t compel me like it once did. Contentedness makes it easy to send roots deeper and deeper.
Tonight fall crickets sing the same notes over and over without tiring. The dog nestles beside me, turns and turns until her bed is ready, plops into a semi-circle, her breath soft, her trust in me complete as I turn off the light.
If you’re interested in purchasing a copy, you can find one HERE. As the weather cools around the country, it’s the perfect time to curl up with a poem or two.
Welcome to another installment in One Minnesota Crone’s Conversation with a Poet series. Today’s poet is Dorsía Smith Silva, poetry editor at The Hopper, editor of Latina/Chicana Mothering, co-editor of several other books, and professor of English at the University of Puerto Rico – Río Piedras. Her soon-to-be-released poetry collection, In Inheritance of Drowning, (CavanKerry Press), is the topic of today’s conversation.
In Inheritance of Drowning, by Dorsía Smith Silva. CavanKerry Press, 2024. $18.
I had scant knowledge of Puerto Rico before I read In Inheritance of Drowning. I knew it was devastated by Hurricane Maria, that the US didn’t do enough for all the people affected. As part of my research while reading In Inheritance of Drowning, I read a Time Magazine piece published shortly after the Hurricane Maria’s havoc which stated nearly half of Americans don’t know Puerto Ricans are American citizens. Crushing debt and fragile infrastructure made – and continue to make – Puerto Rico’s recovery exceedingly difficult. Even though it’s been seven years since Hurricane Maria roared across Puerto Rico, people still suffer. Subsequent difficulties due to the pandemic and earthquakes hammered away further at Puerto Rico’s residents.
But In Inheritance of Drowning is about more than Puerto Rico. It’s about the assorted ways that people, especially people of color, drown. Yes, there is water that rushes over communities during a hurricane. But people also drown from debt, oppression, racism, misunderstanding. People sometimes drown because of actions by others, actions based in greed or ignorance or, alternatively, from inaction caused by simply not caring. As Vincent Toro says in the book’s foreword, “it is essential that the island’s writers provide us with testimonios that allow us a clearer path to understand what it means to live through and beyond disaster.”
In Inheritance of Drowning is, at its heart, a collection of protest and political poetry. It is a call to action, an insistence to find a more compassionate way of living in this world, a life preserver tossed to any outstretched hand.
It is also a celebration of the resilience necessary to go forward.
I’m honored to offer this conversation with Dorsía Smith Silva about her work.
OMC: Dorsía, thank you so much for having a conversation with me about your work, and congratulations on the upcoming November release of In Inheritance of Drowning. When we first corresponded about this conversation, it was around the time that Hurricane Ernesto hit the Caribbean, causing yet another power outage and delaying the start of public school in Puerto Rico. It’s interesting that In Inheritance of Drowning is coming out during hurricane season in an election year. Was that planned or was that coincidence? Are you pleased with the timing?
Dorsía Smith Silva
DSS: Thank you so much for having this conversation with me, Kathleen. I am very happy and grateful to be here!
My publisher, CavanKerry, decided to release In Inheritance of Drowning in November. I think that was primarily due to the scheduling calendar, but I think the timing has been auspicious. The hurricane poems in In Inheritance of Drowning are all the more meaningful, especially with the anniversary of Hurricane María on September 20th. The political poems in the book also connect to the elections, since they explore the meaning of social transformation. The book will be released after the elections though, since my publisher and I realized that most of the national attention (and rightfully so!) will be on the United States presidential election and several significant propositions. I am looking forward to the book’s release on November 12th, and celebrating the book being out into the world.
OMC: In an interview that you did with Cream City Review, you said that you kept a journal about your experience during Hurricane Maria and its aftermath, and this is what spawned the poems that became In Inheritance of Drowning. There’s a rawness that is captured when writing during an experience, but there’s a refinement that only happens later when a writer gets some distance from the original idea. At what point did you feel like you had sat long enough with those journal entries that you could put them into poems? Or were you making poems all along the way while writing in your journal, poems that you later edited? Did this work help keep you grounded during the initial disaster recovery efforts?
DSS: I was writing poems along the way while writing in my notebook. However, I did not realize that they were poems until much time had passed after Hurricane María. I did not look at my notebook for a long time because I was in survival mode, and I think there was some fear of what I had written. Would it be too painful to revisit those memories? Would it bring another layer of trauma to open the notebook? It took months before I was comfortable to open the notebook, and when I did, I was surprised that I had written all kinds of poems—prose, narrative, and lyric. Other poems were strings of thoughts, random words, and phrases. Keeping the notebook and returning to the notebook helped me feel calm. There was so much uncertainty during the recovery efforts that writing felt like a safe and reliable process. Writing to me is still a process that I trust; it makes me happy.
OMC: You framed the book with the hurricane poems, but the middle section leaves Puerto Rico to examine other ways people, particularly people of color, drown in the United States. As I read these poems, especially Everyday Drowning, I found myself counting the names of people killed by the police in the Minneapolis area where I live – Philando Castile, George Floyd, Amir Locke, Duante Wright. I’d like to quote part of stanza 4 from that poem here:
gone quickly gone slowly without prayer in prayer gone from history in plain sight in quiet without questions with questions at any cardinal direction waiting on a cold day on a warm day outside the law inside the law without air with air without blood in blood on the news at anytime on any day in our homes in any city
What struck me is the way you bring in the anywhere-ness of oppression so well here. Any city. My city. Your city. This brings the collection to the front doors of all your readers. What went into the decision to frame the book this way, to shift the focus from Puerto Rico’s boundaries to the broader scope of struggles in the US? I know you’ve addressed this in other interviews and think it’s worth reiterating here.
DSS: The oppression of Puerto Rico is linked to the oppression of BIPOC communities in the United States, especially since it is the same systemic dismantling of identities, violence against Black and brown bodies, and political, social, and racial injustices. I also wanted to show how Puerto Rico has been harmed by the colonialism of the United States in the same ways that BIPOC communities have been affected in the United States. The end results are socioeconomic inequalities, political and financial strangleholds, and the “drownings” of Black and brown bodies. I think In Inheritance of Drowning had to reflect upon Puerto Rico and the United States to show this complex relationship. Sometimes, people are unaware that Puerto Rico is actually a colony (not a territory) of the United States, and this subordinate status begs the question, “When will Puerto Rico be free?” It’s the same question that BIPOC communities may also ask: “When can we be free from oppression in the United States?”
OMC: Thank you. I wish we could say those questions are going to be answered and acted upon right now. There’s work to be done by all of us.
Your book pushes readers to consider what they see in this world, where help might be offered, where beauty can still be appreciated, where rebuilding must happen for a better future for all. What do you consider the most hopeful poem in In Inheritance of Drowning and why?
DSS: Thank you for acknowledging this in the book! I hope other readers glean this important message as well—about beauty and rebuilding. I think the opening poem reveals a sense of hope. Hurricanes do not have to be “skylights of horror,” if we humans made more of an effort to combat global warming. If we saw our connection to the environment—let’s say as kin—, then we would hopefully make better environmental choices, which in turn would decrease the number and strength of hurricanes. The effect would be less destruction, loss of lives, and financial ruin. Hurricanes would then just be beautiful bright colors on a weather map. We could see them as having “intoxicating possibilities and mysteries” without their trauma and widespread damage.
What the Poet is Supposed to Write about a Hurricane
What the poet is supposed to write about a hurricane should be skylights of horror, not skip rocks of beauty in walls of wind, affixed to the puzzle pieces of the vortex eye, spinning like a lost continent’s soul. How the lively whips should stun the mouths of gravity, hissing without hesitation, engulfing the stench of uprooted dirt and grass. The poet is supposed to decode the stanzas, shudder the name María into frail syllables: to wish a hurricane a fast and gritty death, not say its stubborn slow dances held intoxicating possibilities and mysteries.
OMC: Oh, that’s a perfect poem choice. And your idea of treating other living creatures as kin instead of something separate – that’s something that resonates for me. Our environment is our home. We must take care of it.
Do you plan on continuing to explore the issues examined in In Inheritance of Drowning in future works? Anything on the horizon?
DSS: This is an excellent question! I am currently working on poems that examine the many Puerto Ricans that were forced to flee Puerto Rico after Hurricane María. Some of these poems will be about the precarious political and environmental conditions in Puerto Rico that were exacerbated after Hurricane María, and other poems will be about the social, political, and racial inequalities in the United States. I am also composing some poems that explore the psychological turmoil that occurs when people are displaced from their homelands. I am excited to see where this collection will take me.
To celebrate In Inheritance of Drowning’s birthday, I am going to challenge myself to read a poetry book by a BIPOC author every day in November. I am going to model the challenge after the Sealey Challenge and call it the Smith Silva Challenge. I am looking forward to reading for fun and just diving into a pile of books! There are several poetry books that I cannot wait to begin, including Danez Smith’s Bluff and Eduardo Martínez-Leyva’s Cowboy Park.
OMC: I’ve done the Sealey Challenge; I love that you’re creating the Smith Silva Challenge for BIPOC-authored poetry books! What a great way to celebrate. And I very much look forward to seeing more of your poetry in the future.
Thank you for sharing your process and insights today. I hope you have a wonderful release party planned! Anyone you’d like to give a shout-out to before we wrap up?
DSS: Thank you so much again, Kathleen! I would like to thank Shara McCallum, Frances Richey, Derrick Austin, and Velma Pollard for writing such wonderful reviews of In Inheritance of Drowning. A million thanks to Vincent Toro, the author of Hivestruck, for writing the introduction to In Inheritance of Drowning. The introduction is brilliant; I was ready to cry after I had read it. I also want to thank Poets & Writers for including me in the Get the Word Out and 5 over 50 cohorts. Their support has been life-changing.
It was such a pleasure to have this conversation. Many thanks, Kathleen!
In Inheritance of Drowning is available from CavanKerry Press HERE.
Find links to Dorsía Smith Silva’s interviews and publications through her website HERE.
Follow Dorsía Smith Silva on Instagram @dsmithsilva.
In my last post, I wasn’t ready for summer to end. Today, as I walked on the trails near Snail Lake in Shoreview, Minnesota, there was clearly a tinge of autumn creeping across the landscape. Trees and grasses have taken on a yellowish hue, asters are in full bloom, geese gather together and lift off from lakes in a flurry of splashing water and honking. In our own garden, fall blooming flowers are alive with pollinators, while birds feast on seeds from spent flower heads.
Golden foliage and Canada geese on Snail Lake, Shoreview, Minnesota.
Morning sunlight through yellowing ferns.
A lone great blue heron hangs out in the wetlands near Snail Lake.
Fall-blooming mist flowers in our garden attract butterflies.
A trio of sparrows nestles in the wildflower garden behind our house.
And everything feels just right.
COMING UP ON ONE MINNESOTA CRONE
My Conversation with a Poet series will continue on October 1 with Puerto Rican poet Dorsía Smith Silva. I hope you’ll stop on by!
Waning pansies don’t like the heat. Photo by kcmickelson.
As I type this, I’m sitting at the table on the deck in back of our house. My phone says it’s 88 degrees, 67% humidity – what local weather forecasters call swampy. In the thick air, cicadas buzz over and over, a small plane circles over the fairgrounds a mile and a half away, and vehicle traffic on Snelling Avenue hums. The sky has been dark all day, but without rain.
Usually, the appearance of September 1 on the calendar puts me into an autumn mood. Not this year. This summer has been swift in its journey, so hopeful in mood over the past several weeks that I don’t want it to be over just yet. Even with school beginning here in a couple of days, it doesn’t feel like the end of summer. The fall equinox is still a few weeks away, so I feel justified in declaring that summer isn’t done yet.
The fullness of life here in the later days of summer is something I want to embrace with both arms.
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Mick and I spent as much time as we could watching the Democratic National Convention together. We felt the electricity generated by the excited crowds and fired-up speakers, felt the certainty that we have a shot at making our country better than it’s been since 2016. It was just in July that I felt like these were the last days for the U.S., as we slid towards an impossible choice for the U.S. presidential election in November. Then Kamala Harris replaced Joe Biden. Tim Walz as running mate gave us all a dad/coach pep talk. The momentum of a joyous burst of possibility happened.
It was as if the sun broke through what had been a long line of storms.
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Here in Minnesota, the last days of summer always mean the Minnesota State Fair is in session. Twelve days of thousands of people streaming into the fairgrounds – people who wait in line for beer, fries, ice cream, deep-fried cheese curds, pronto pups, and mini-donuts regardless of their political affiliation, religion, gender identity, race, or other group-specific connections. There is unity in securing fair food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner while strolling around the Midway or through the animal barns or standing in front of one of the free music stages. Our state fair is the largest in the country for average daily attendance, and I almost never miss it. This year, people are out full-force, having a great time in spite of long, long lines and the divisive politics just beyond the fairground gates. Even the political booths inside the fairgrounds show the impact of recent shifts in the country’s mood. And, anyway, who can stay angry or spiteful with a mouthful of deep-fried food they just bit off a stick?
The fair’s opening day was the same day Kamala Harris gave her acceptance speech at the DNC. The euphoric mood of the week spilled over everywhere.
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The day after I linger in swampy air on the deck, storm clouds gather. By 7 p.m., the sky is darker than it should be. Mick and I sit down to eat a salad of greens, shredded carrots, sliced cucumbers, hard boiled eggs, and grated Parmesan, dressed with olive oil and balsamic vinegar. Neither of us can tolerate heavy food on these sauna-like days. It’s more humid than yesterday, the temperature higher, and an unsettled feeling builds. As it gets darker outside, I can’t resist jumping up to go out on the front step and look at the sky. Clouds swirl and scuttle overhead, while lightning flickers nonstop. I go back inside, sweat beginning to form along my hairline.
I’ve been sweating all day. It was moving day for our neighbors across the street. A “Two Men and a Truck” moving truck pulled into their driveway around 8 a.m. That they were moving on one of the hottest days of the summer was unfortunate, but the movers had the household loaded up before noon. Two other neighbors and I went over with our vacuum cleaners when the movers finished, did a last clean-up for our neighbors so they could leave a pristine home for the next family. All of us sweat like crazy. Beads of sweat formed within minutes on our necks and foreheads, our upper lips and in the smalls of our backs. Now, as we all await rain, I am grateful for air conditioning. My little visit to the front step reminded me that 90+ degrees with high humidity makes it a little harder to breathe.
The rain, when it comes, is a deluge. I think of the people at the fair, know from experience that it’s hard to find a place indoors where there aren’t already hundreds of others taking shelter. I look outside our living room window at the way the backyard birch trees bend in the wind gusts, how the tall Joe Pye weed bows to the storm.
It storms for the better part of an hour. We are lucky to find all our trees still standing when the storm subsides, lucky to still have power at our house. All over the metro, people can no longer turn on their lights or their air conditioners or electric fans. A sweltering evening is not a time to have the power fail. But in a display of unexpected beauty, the funky orange clouds show a rainbow at the same moment a lightning bolt zaps the sky in two. Those who manage to capture the image post it all over social media in a shared sense of awe.
A second severe storm rolls through while we sleep. The power for all the houses across the street from us goes out and stays out. I get a message from my friend down the street soon after I’m awake asking if she can dry her hair at our house if her power isn’t on by early afternoon.
Our rain gauge shows 2.5 inches of water for the past 24 hours. Everything in the garden bows down now. But despite the torrential rains, lightning, straight-line winds, and power outages, the morning opens up with birdsong. With cooler air. With light.
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Mick and I meander around the state fair two days after the storms. The weather is perfect, a few clouds, no rain, less humid. Power is still out in some areas, but the fair is lit up, rides going, music playing all around. We stop at the Ball Park Cafe, where our friend Mark works during the fair, buy beer and say hello. We run into friends from Mick’s softball team, raise our beer glasses to each other, then go our separate ways. We listen to The Jorgensens, the band Mick’s saxophone teacher plays for at the Schells Stage. That’s only a prelude. We have plans to see Marky Ramone and his band play Ramones songs later in the evening at the Leinie Lodge Bandshell.
After sampling soba noodles and veggies, Greek feta cheese balls, and deep-fried cheese curds, we settle into some seats for Marky Ramone. It’s dusk now, a great time for some old-school punk rock. When the band comes on stage, everyone stands up and stays on their feet for the entire hour-and-fifteen-minute set. They play everything rapid fire, no talking between songs, just go-go-go. The audience knows these songs, sings I wanna be sedated and I don’t want to be buried in the pet sematary and more at the top of their lungs. When the band takes a short break at the one-hour mark, the whole audience yells hey ho, let’s go! until the band reappears. Mick and I have a blast. We stick around afterwards to see the fireworks following the grandstand show, which was some country act that we don’t listen to. Lots of people stop in the streets to look up, watch the flowering lights in the sky.
As we leave the fairgrounds a little before 10:30 p.m., we are greeted with a couple of guys drumming on upside-down five-gallon buckets just outside the gate. There are drummers there every year. I love the sound they make as we cross the street with a whole swarm of people to get to our bus to go home.
This is exactly how late summer should feel: joyous, noisy, fun. An invitation to dive in, make the most of everything before dropping into bed, fully exhausted, sated, and happy.
This is the feeling I’ll hang onto a little longer, the one I hope carries us right through the election in November.
Marky Ramone and his band at the Minnesota State Fair 2024. Photo by kcmickelson.
I notice the light is shifting to the left as I look out our front door on these August mornings, see how the line of shade from our house expands over the garden just beyond our front steps. I rearrange the container gardens that grace those steps so the variegated Boston fern can get the few hours of sunlight it needs to keep multiple hues of green in its leaves. The hard little crabapple nubs are just beginning to turn into juicy treats that robins and cedar waxwings will gorge themselves on in another month. Hints of autumnal chill hover in the early morning air.
crabapples just starting to change color
We’ve come to that poignant part of summer once again, the part where our full gardens spill into the driveway and street and sidewalk, back-to-school supplies crowd Target’s aisles, school-age kids think about who will be in their classes in September, and grandparents like me offer childcare for the upcoming school year. Granddaughter Maeve will return for regular days with my partner Mick and me next Monday. We will go through the toys and books we have for her before she returns, cull out what she’s outgrown now that she’s almost three. Our older granddaughter Camille may hang out with us a few times before she returns to school, although at 13, she might prefer spending her days somewhere else. And that’s okay. She is growing up, her own light shifting just like the light outside.
As I write this, I’m sitting on the chair on our front steps, waiting for the arrival of Maeve, Camille, and their parents, who are both teachers, as they swing by to drop off their dog so they can take a much-needed mini-vacation for my daughter-in-law’s birthday. Martin, a rescue lab mix, is somewhere around eight years old and I love how doofy he is. We haven’t had a dog of our own for almost three years now, and I miss having one much of the time. I don’t miss having to arrange for dog care when we travel, though, and that’s the one thing that keeps us from getting another dog. Martin will be a nice guest to have for a few days, just enough of a dog fix to tide me over a little longer. Just enough companionship to make these days feel a little more joyful.
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Martin and I walk through our neighborhood midmorning the day after he comes to stay with us. It’s a quiet morning. Mick is off playing softball, so it’s just Martin and me. Martin is a pretty big dog, solid and calm. Mostly. He doesn’t like other dogs, so barks and pulls when one comes near. It takes all my strength to keep him from lunging. Once the dog is past, we are fine. And he’s good with people, except for the man who comes up behind me. Martin turns around and issues a low protective growl. The man says good morning. Martin and I both relax.
Martin keeps his eyes on me
As Martin and I stroll along, I think about how dogs make us get outside and move around, one of their gifts to us. As Martin pauses to sniff here and there, he reminds me that slowing down to notice things is part of a good walk. We don’t have to pass everything by in the name of getting our steps in. We can – and should – see what’s there, notice who passed this way before us, who planted flowers that call to the bees, who spilled their ice cream in the driveway, and who left a water bowl out for passing canines to lap from. When I walk the neighborhood with my granddaughter Maeve, I feel that same sense of slowing down to take notice. Maeve isn’t much taller than Martin.
Maybe I should add more things to our own garden for dogs and kids to enjoy. That would be an easy shift to make. It might bring someone else joy.
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In a few days, I’ll turn 65. This particular birthday once seemed a lifetime away, along with its Medicare card and senior discounts and this light-gray hair that I’m growing out. In fact, my hair is nearly white. Earlier this year, I decided I missed having long hair and started the painful process of growing it out from a very short textured cut. It’s finally past the truly awkward stage, but still too short to pull into a ponytail when I’m gardening or painting. I’m glad for baseball caps.
This is what 65 looks like.
I’m very clear that I’m not dying my hair to make myself look younger. This gray-white hair catches the light differently, looks platinum in a black-and-white photograph, has its own kind of glory. This is what 65 looks like. I’m comfortable with that, happy to still be on this earth.
I don’t wonder how close I am to the end. Who has time for that? There’s too much that’s wonderful in the now.
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One thing I do wonder about on nearly a daily basis is what kind of impact I’m leaving behind. How much good am I doing? How much damage? These thoughts are most often in reference to my own adult kids, with my ever-expanding understanding that this world is not at all the same one I grew up in. There’s a lot of meanness out in the open, a lot of cavalier ideas that we can all do whatever we want and everyone around us can just suck it up.
I do not want to contribute further damage to a warming world that oppresses anyone who isn’t in power at the moment. I don’t want to add to the climate change that will kill all kinds of plants, animals, and people by being careless, thoughtless, selfish. By thinking accumulated money is the only accurate measure of a life or a business. By thinking there is only one legitimate religion. By discounting anyone different from myself.
This life has so many options. There are so many opportunities to create a community, listen to someone whose experience is different from our own, learn that every path has its perks. The fear of any change that is often expressed around election time – We’re losing our country! This is going to cost us too much! No more immigrants! That idea will never work! Our birthrate is dropping and it’s all the fault of women who don’t want kids! – is such a hinderance to peace and progress. Fear shatters compassion, encloses us in a dark, dark room with no windows.
Getting older offers clarity about what really matters. After living through life’s assorted ups and downs – money and no money, college interrupted and restarted, housing with cockroaches and faulty plumbing followed by a well-maintained house that I co-own, working in jobs where men were sexist and then where they weren’t, learning first-hand how single mothers are treated after my first marriage went up in flames then being treated so differently after Mick’s and my daughter was born a year and a half into our marriage, leaving the Catholic Church, learning about Zen Buddhism and other religious views – how I see the world has been shaped and reshaped and reshaped again. Throw in some world travel, seeing firsthand how people outside the US actually live, and there came another shift.
There are a lot of answers to be had out there in the world. No one has them all.
——
On Martin’s last day with us, the sky clouds over after a gorgeous morning of sun and light breezes. All morning long, my friend Luann and I share time together, sip coffee, buy baby gifts for the family next door who welcomed their daughter two weeks ago. We talk about how it feels to have a new baby, miss sleep, alternate between exhilaration and exhaustion, figure out a new way to be in the world. We decide to include coffee, tea, and chocolate in the gift bag.
As I sit in a chair waiting for Shawn, Beka, Camille, and Maeve to come collect Martin, I keep going over this essay, wrestling with what I want to say here in mid-August in my last days of being 64. When I look up from my laptop, I see the very first yellowed leaf on our backyard birch, a surprise. It feels too early. But change starts with one little thing, doesn’t it? Just one small yellow light in a dark green canopy.
Pequod Poems: Gamming with Moby-Dick by Wilda Morris (Kelsay Books, 2019). Paperback, 123 pages. $17.00
Today, poet Wilda Morris will share her ideas about poetry and the poet’s place in the world as she discusses her work and her pre-pandemic book, Pequod Poems: Gamming with Moby-Dick. Wilda is based in Illinois, former president of both Poets & Patrons of Chicago and the Illinois State Poetry Society. She is widely published and leads workshops for both children and adults.
When Wilda first contacted me about having a conversation that included Pequod Poems, I’ll admit I was hesitant. Pequod Poems is based on Moby-Dick by Herman Melville, a mid-nineteenth-century novel that I have never read. Poems in the first part of the book are each from the point of view of a character in the novel, and I soon found that I needed to have at least a passing acquaintance with Melville’s story to engage with Wilda’s poems. Hello, Cliff Notes, which gave me just enough about the overall themes, story arc, and characters to appreciate the effort Wilda put into this collection. The later poems in the book connect Melville’s themes to present day events.
Herman Melville was born on August 1, 1819, in New York City. Wilda told me she would love our conversation to appear on Melville’s birthday, so here it is. Whether you’ve read Melville or not, you just might find something here that grabs you. I’ve included links at the end if you wish to get your own copy of Pequod Poems or one of Wilda’s other poetry books – which are not based on Moby-Dick.
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OMC: Hello, Wilda, and thank you for reaching out to discuss your work. I understand that you came to poetry late in life, after the death of your first grandchild. Can you please talk a little about that turn, how you chose poetry as your creative outlet, and what poetry has done to make your life better?
WM: I always loved poetry and wrote some when I was younger. I published a few poems as a young adult, but after my husband and I adopted five children, I did not find much time to write. During the same period of my life when my granddaughter Florrie was dying, I was spending half of each summer at the Green Lake Conference Center in Wisconsin as a curriculum counselor. I was able to attend their annual writer’s conference (which, unfortunately, is no longer held). I didn’t have enough confidence in my poetry to attend the poetry workshop the first year, but I met with the poetry leader at the end of the week, and she encouraged me to sign up for poetry the next year. I did, and I was hooked. I found writing about Florrie to be healing. She has been gone three decades, but still pops up in my poems now and then.
I find that involvement in poetry means involvement in communities. The Illinois State Poetry Society, Poets and Patrons of Chicago, the San Miguel Poetry Week, the poets who attended workshops at the Green Lake Conference Center, poets who submitted to the monthly contests on my blog, the poets who return year after year to The Clearing in Wisconsin, poets who attend conferences of the National Federation of State Poetry Societies, and the participants in the on-going haiku classes which I’ve been attending have all become communities. We have learned to care for each other. That kind of community-building makes for a better world.
OMC: I love the idea of all these collections of people who come together for poetry becoming small communities. I’ve seen how the poetry community as a whole is full of generous people who help each other out, and this nicely illustrates how community-building is an important reason to seek out poetry groups and conferences.
Pequod Poems came out just before the pandemic shut everything down. One of the things you told me earlier was that the pandemic prevented you from doing the in-person readings that would have been natural when your book was just published. So, let’s dive right into talking about the book.
As I read through it, I kept thinking about how an obsessive desire for revenge, even when it’s to the detriment of everyone involved, is certainly illustrated here and can be seen in what’s happening in this very divided world around us. I also appreciated mentions of the near-destruction of entire species due to human greed. My favorite part of the book came later, for example with the poem, Father Mapple’s Message for the 21st Century. And in your poem, Lamenting Fate, you wrote about assigning Moby-Dick to college students: “It’s a / must-read for anyone who wants to understand the / play between free will and fate.” What themes examined in Pequod Poems as well as in Moby-Dick do you believe are most important right now and why?
Wilda Morris (photo provided)
WM: Melville was writing as the U.S. was moving headlong toward civil war. Our country is probably more divided now than any time since that era. Ahab tacks a gold coin called a doubloon up on the mast and offers it as a reward to whoever first spots the white whale, In Chapter 99, several characters pass by the doubloon and comment on the various aspects of its design—each one seeing something entirely different. Melville is indicating that we each see what we want to see and interpret situations in ways that please us. We can see this, too, in the various ways the white whale is still interpreted: some see him representing God; others see him as representative of the devil. I think we can see how that is happening in this country today.
A related theme—centered in the personality of Ahab—is the importance of responsible leadership. Ahab is a demagogue. He’s narcissistic, sociopathic, monomaniacal, and vengeful. To get vengeance against the white whale for biting off his leg, he is willing to sacrifice everything and everyone else. He brings down the ship and whole crew (except for Ishmael who escapes to tell the tale). I believe the Pequod represents the “ship of state.” There were 30 states in the US when Moby-Dick was written—and 30 crew members on the Pequod. Surely that is not a coincidence! Starbuck, the first mate, knows where things are headed, but he does not have the courage to confront Ahab in any serious way. He knows Ahab has used his charisma to persuade the crew to buy into his vengeful goal. Starbuck fears he might lose his position (or worse) if he leads a rebellion against Ahab.
Another major theme which is still important is racial diversity, inequality and related issues. The crew is diverse, but the captain and three mates are all white. The black cook and Pip, the black cabin boy, are treated shamefully. Initially Ishmael is afraid of Queequeg, but as he gets to know this dark-skinned foreigner, he learns that Queequeg is friendly, loyal, and capable. He concludes that it’s better to share space with a “sober cannibal than a drunken Christian.” How many people are willing to get to know people of other ethnic and religious backgrounds unless circumstances force them to do so? How often are white males willing to share power with people of color? While pushing the reader to think of these things, Melville also highlights how interdependent we all are.
OMC: You’ve done a nice job of showing how a nineteenth-century story is very much relevant in today’s society. Those who are in power don’t want to share it, and that has been the case throughout history.
Do you have some favorite poems from Pequod Poems? And may I share them below?
WM: From what I have read, it appears that Melville’s mother, like Ishmael’s, was stern and judgmental. My mother (an American Baptist) was invited by a Catholic nun to work with her in jail ministry. During her 30 years working at the Johnson County (IA) jail, Mother never asked inmates what crimes they committed—she just loved them and showed them grace. Maybe that’s why I’m fond of this Shakespearean sonnet.
Ishmael Reflects on the Try-Works FireBeginning with a line from Chapter 96
Look not too long in the face of the fire—
those forking flames are a devilish sight.
The blaze hypnotizes as it grows higher;
it blinds your eyes to the sun’s true light.
I’ll never believe what I’ve been taught
by my frowning mother, that all men fell
and my soul is damned—in the flames I’m caught.
She said, Go to church, or you’ll go to hell.
Instead of the fire with guilt and dread,
turn to the wisdom of Solomon’s book
or the Man of Sorrows, the life he led—
he spread compassion with his gentle look.
How different would be my mother’s face
if her theology reflected grace.
I like “Reminder” because of its relevance to this era:
Reminder If your banker breaks, you snap; if your apothecary by mistake sends you poison in your pills, you die. ~Ishmael (Moby-Dick, Chapter 72) Ending with a line from Chapter 13
Even here in the U.S., where Whitman, Emerson and Thoreau wrote of individuality and we are told to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps, it is true: if the housing bubble bursts, your home is worth less than your twenty-year mortgage. If the stock market declines, your retirement fund bleeds.
You may be the safest driver in the state, but if the teen in the Toyota texts or drinks and drives, you end up under carved stone. The drive-by shooter with bad aim may miss the Gangster Disciple and hit your daughter instead.
If your young son runs to the park with friends, plays with the gun Uncle Joe bought him from the Walmart toy department, and, even if it doesn’t look real, someone in a blue uniform assumes it’s loaded with lead you have to pick a casket and plan a funeral.
Someone assassinates an archduke in Austria, Japan bombs a U.S. naval base, North Korea sends troops across the 38th parallel, Iraq invades Kuwait, planes flatten the World Trade Center— if you pause and think it through, you know Queequeg was right, It’s a mutual, joint-stock world, in all meridians.
Of the poems related specifically to characters from Moby-Dick, I think “The Lament of Starbuck’s Son” is my favorite because it reflects how any child might feel after losing a parent:
The Lament of Starbuck’s Son
Mother says my father was a brave man, a hero of the whale fishery, but to me he is absence, emptiness.
Mother says my father was kind, a tender, loving man, but to me he is heartbreak, Mother’s tears, her loneliness.
Mother says my father was pious, a faithful, believing man but to me, he is a question— why a loving God lets a father drown.
Mother says my father was handsome, wind-tanned, a well-remembered man but to me he is a fading memory and ongoing silence.
OMC: Thank you for sharing those.
You used many, many different poetic forms in Pequod Poems. The notes at the end of the book that talk about the different forms was quite helpful; there were forms I’d never heard of in this collection. It feels like you had a lot of fun playing around with these various forms to see how they could enhance what you wanted to say. Can you talk a bit about what led you to build the poetry collection in this way? Were there any poetic forms that you’ve decided you’ll never work in again?
WM: In writing Moby-Dick, Melville used a variety of forms, including prose narrative, song, drama, soliloquy, encyclopedia entry, etc., so it seemed appropriate for me to use a variety of forms in responding to the book. I do love to try out new forms. One advantage of writing formal poems part of the time is that the form may push you to write something you would not have thought of. If the form requires a rhyme or lines with a set meter, it may direct you. You can end up with an insight you might not have had. I had a writing residency on Martha’s Vineyard, which gave me time to experiment with forms. The most challenging was the name lipogram—I could only use letters that occur in Herman Melville’s name. Since he had no middle name, I was limited to six consonants and three vowels. There is no form in the book I wouldn’t use again, though I don’t plan to write very many sestinas.
OMC: Are there other classic novels upon which you can see yourself basing another poetry collection? Or are you more interested in building future collections around some other idea?
WM: I have thought about the possibility of writing a book of poems responding to Don Quixote, but unless I’m still alive and writing when I’m 110, I’m not likely to get around to it.
OMC: Do you have any new projects in the works?
WM: I’m finishing up a chapbook which will probably be titled The Bee Museum. Some of the poems in that collection were originally in a project I’m calling Not Science 101. Robin Chapman, one of my poet mentors, said I had almost enough bee poems for a chapbook and suggested I take them from the draft of the large manuscript. I followed her advice. When I finish with The Bee Museum, I’ll go back to the broader collection. Most of the poems in Not Science 101 have epigraphs from books or articles on scientific subjects. Sometimes I respond seriously, sometimes with humor.
I recently printed out all the poems I have on my computer. If I could find the time, I could put together a book or two of nature poems, a volume on love, another on faith, a book of humorous poems, and an autobiography in verse. Time will tell what gets published. Life is not always predictable.
OMC: I can’t wait to see The Bee Museum. I love poetry based on science.
This has all been very interesting and certainly encourages readers to rethink the relevance of Moby-Dick to today as well as investigating the pleasure of playing with different poetic forms. Thank you for sharing your background and motivations for your work. I appreciate your insights and the opportunity to learn a thing or two.
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If you’re interested in obtaining a copy of Pequod Poems: Gamming with Moby-Dick, click HERE.
Wilda Morris’s most recent book, At Goat Hollow and Other Poems, may be found HERE.
Visit Wilda Morris’s Blogger site, which ran Wilda Morris’s Poetry Challenge until 2023, HERE. Wilda is thankful for everyone who participated in the poetry challenge during its 15-year run.
One of the reasons I love to have friends and family visit from out of town and stay at our house is that I get to be an explorer at home, re-examining what the Twin Cities has to offer. I love to share the places I go to often and find out what has changed in the neighborhoods I don’t get to much. It’s also fun to do something simply because someone else thought it was a good idea.
When my old grad school friend Alice and her partner Mark drove up from Wichita one recent weekend, I got to be that explorer. First up was going to the St. Paul Farmer’s Market on Saturday morning. I love the Farmer’s Market and, since we cook a lot even when we have guests, wanted to give Alice and Mark the chance to pick out things they liked for dinner. We came home with a lot of veggies, but we also had a great time just experiencing the beauty of a market that was full of freshly-harvested foods and flowers, happy people, and fresh air.
Alice and Mark and some really gorgeous flowers
We later strolled down St. Paul’s Grand Avenue, where there are a multitude of restaurants and coffee shops and my favorite, Penzeys, where I buy a lot of my spices. Then we were off to the Target store near my house in Roseville, which was the very first one in the country, opening in 1962. (File that away for your next Trivia night.) We actually did need a few things, but I felt kind of weird standing in the parking lot while Alice took a photo for another friend who loves Target.
Anyway…..our Saturday night fun was thanks to my friends, who are very interested in theater and bought tickets for us to go to the History Theater in downtown St. Paul, We saw Glensheen, a play about Marjorie Caldwell and the Glensheen murders that happened in Duluth in the 1970s. For those of you not from here, Glensheen was a mansion owned by 83-year-old Elisabeth Congdon, one of Minnesota’s richest people at the time, and she was murdered along with her nurse, Velma Pietila. Marjorie Caldwell was Congdon’s adopted daughter, a sociopath with a long, troubled history. The play is based on the book by Jeffrey Hatcher. By the way, it’s a musical comedy with music and lyrics by Chan Poling (you may know of him as a founding member of the Minneapolis band The Suburbs), and it’s a hoot. It would not have occurred to me to go see a musical comedy about a real-life murder, but I’m glad I did.
And the Saints beat the Gwinnett Stripers 4-3!
Sunday found us at CHS Field to watch the St. Paul Saints play baseball. Mick and I love the Saints, so were delighted that Mark is a big baseball fan who wanted to see them play. The game we attended against the Gwinnett Stripers included naming the ball pig for the second half of the season. The ball pig is a real piglet that gets trotted out between innings and there’s always a naming contest for each new pig. This particular “Catcher in the Sty” was christened Joe Sower H.O.G. 24. If you’re in the area and want to watch baseball, there are always the Twins, but the Saints are a whole other experience. Go if you can.
Ah, summer. My houseguests have moved on, but I’m going to keep this vacation state of mind. I’m having too much fun to let it go. If you want to see where else I end up over the summer, come find me on Instagram @kcmickelson.